Ghanaian actress and entrepreneur Salma Mumin has shared the one condition that would lead her to marriage.
In a recent interview on a radio station in Kumasi, Salma Mumin revealed that she would only marry a man she is in love with.
She stated that before getting married, she seeks a man who genuinely loves her. In her conversation with Nana Wiser of Angel FM, the renowned actress specified the terms and conditions any potential suitor must fulfill.
During the discussion, Salma Mumin stressed that love would be the foundation for marrying any man, though financial stability is also important.
“The person must love me, then I can love him back,” she said.
Initially hesitant to discuss the matter, the actress later mentioned that other requirements, such as showing her affection, should also be fulfilled.
Salma Mumin, accompanied by her fellow actress Fella Makafui, was initially reluctant to address the subject.
However, she eventually shared that she would contemplate marriage only if the conditions were advantageous for her.
It takes a combination of patience, respect for their sentiments, and sincere interest to develop a lasting connection with someone and win them over.
You may accomplish this without putting too much strain on yourself by following these steps:
Be yourself
Authenticity is crucial. Pretending to be someone you’re not is unsustainable and can lead to disappointment for both parties. Show her who you really are, including your interests, values, and quirks.
Show genuine interest
Take time to get to know her: Ask about her interests and listen actively. Engage in conversations that are meaningful to her. Remember details from your conversations and bring them up later to show you were listening.
Be supportive
Support her goals and ambitions: Encourage her dreams and aspirations. Be there during tough times as a supportive friend. Celebrate her successes genuinely.
Build a friendship
A strong romantic relationship often starts with a solid friendship: Spend time together doing things you both enjoy. Build trust and rapport by being reliable and honest. Share experiences and create positive memories.
Respect her space
Everyone needs personal space and time: Don’t overwhelm her with constant attention. Respect her boundaries and personal time. Give her space to pursue her interests and spend time with other friends.
Use positive body language
Non-verbal cues can convey your feelings without being overly direct: Maintain eye contact to show interest. Smile and use open body language to appear approachable and friendly. Respect her personal space and avoid invading it.
Be confident but humble
Confidence is attractive, but arrogance is a turn-off: Believe in yourself and your worth. Be humble and avoid boasting about your achievements. Show vulnerability; it makes you relatable.
Create opportunities for shared experiences
Shared experiences can build a deeper connection: Plan activities that you both enjoy. Suggest group outings to ease any pressure. Invite her to events where you can both have fun and interact naturally.
Communicate clearly
Good communication can prevent misunderstandings: Express your feelings honestly but respectfully. Ask for her opinion and respect it, even if it differs from yours. Be a good listener and validate her feelings.
Give compliments and appreciate her
Everyone likes to feel appreciated: Compliment her genuinely on things you admire. Express appreciation for her qualities and actions. Avoid superficial compliments; focus on her character and achievements.
Be patient
Relationships take time to develop: Don’t rush things; let the relationship evolve naturally. Be patient and give her time to reciprocate feelings. Understand that true feelings can take time to grow.
Accept the outcome gracefully
Not every effort will lead to a romantic relationship: Be prepared for any outcome and respect her feelings. Accept her decision gracefully if she doesn’t feel the same way. Maintain a positive attitude and continue to be a good friend.
Winning someone’s affection without applying too much pressure is about balance and respect. By being genuine, supportive, and patient, you create an environment where a mutual connection can naturally develop.
Remember, the goal is to build a relationship based on mutual respect and understanding, not to force someone into liking you.
Valentine’s Day, often referred to as Val’s Day, is a celebration observed on February 14 each year. It’s a day people express their affection and love for one another through gestures like giving gifts, sending cards, or spending quality time together.
It’s named after Saint Valentine, a Christian martyr who is associated with love and romance.
While it’s traditionally a day for couples, many people also celebrate by showing appreciation for friends and family. TIGPost went on the streets to sample the perspectives of Ghanaians on how love is expressed in their various tribes and ethnic groups. This is a taste of love brewed in Ghana! Enjoy!
A Fante woman’s perspective
Maame Aba, said Fantes like her love to cook. As such, they love to express their love by cooking for their loved ones.
“Fante women love cooking so that is one of the ways we show love to our families and our significant others. And we also love words of motivation like telling you ‘you’re beautiful,’ ‘you are doing well so keep it up’ and we are also just caring. We are serviceable as well.
“Generally, we want to make sure you’re okay, find out if you need any assistance, very helpful. We always want to assist if you need any help,” she said.
A Ga woman’s perspective
Naa Quaye, a Ga, also said expressing love ‘the Ga way’ is no different from how other ethnic groups in Ghana do. She said the people of Ga love surprises and love it when their significant others express their love by surprising them with gifts and others.
“So among the Ga people, we love surprises. If you love someone, one way you can express it is by buying the person gifts and providing the needs of the person because like i said, we love surprises,” she said.
A Sandema woman’s perspective
Sandra Balami hails from Sandema, situated in the Upper East Region. According to her, the people of Sandema are known for their remarkable generosity and penchant for expressing affection through acts of kindness.
“The people of Sandema are very generous. We love expressing love by giving to others; so we cook and give some to our neighbors, we gift people goats, foodstuff, and others and I think this has really impacted me in a way.
“So on Val’s day I’ll get you [my partner] a thoughtful gift, it could be anything at all – a watch, clothes, shoes – or anything. We could go out, sit somewhere and spend some quality time together,” she said.
A Bolgatanga man’s perspective
Benard Atanga, also from Bolgatanga in the Northern region, said people from where he hails from, express their love by gifting items to loved ones and going out as well. He said he would prefer to climax the day with a romantic night out with their partner.
An Akuapem woman’s perspective
“Akuapems love showing off. They are the type who can announce to everyone that ‘this is my husband’ or ‘this is my wife.’ They really like showing off and on a day like this, my mum [an Akuapem] would throw a party for my dad. She would also prepare a special meal for him,” Akua Asabea recounted.
A Kwahu man’s perspective
As an Akan precisely from Kwahu, Kwasi Odame, said: “We find difficulty in showing love to our loved ones even though we love them dearly. Mostly we show love by providing everything our loved ones love. But for affections, we hardly show them.”
Popular social media influencer and Onua FM presenter, Felicia Osei, candidly expressed worry about marriage during a recent interview on the “30 Questions” podcast.
Fearful of the possibility of falling in love with someone else after marriage, Felicia shared her concerns about the challenges and uncertainties associated with the institution.
In response to Quophi Okyeame’s questions, Felicia admitted, “Marriage is my biggest fear. I keep asking myself, ‘what if you fall in love with somebody else after marriage? What if you meet someone else? What will you do if you fall in love with another person after marriage? What if you cheat in marriage, what causes cheating? Marriage, Marriage, Marriage. What if you get bored living with the person you are married to?”
Despite being content as a spinster, Felicia mentioned that she intends to consider marriage when the time is right.
The snippet of the interview, shared on Instagram by Quophi Okyeame, sparked various responses, including insights from veteran hiplife artiste Reggie Rockstone, who emphasized the challenges and rewards of marriage, urging a perspective of forgiveness and acknowledging the effort required in making a marriage successful.
Valentine’s Day marks a special moment in the lives of couples.
The pressure is on for partners to prove their worth in the realms of love and intimacy.
However, there’s a radical idea, abandon the hype and focus on maintaining a romantic connection throughout the entire year.
Beyond the flowers and chocolates, these five relationship tips offer a foundation for enduring love:
Prioritise Meaningful Spending Over Materialism:
Embrace fiscal responsibility as a way to reduce stress and enhance intimacy. Collaborate on budgeting and find happiness in shared experiences, valuing the connection over material possessions.
Cherish Experiences Over Possessions:
Recognize that shared experiences bring more fulfilment than accumulating possessions. Whether it’s spending quality time with family, pampering your significant other, or taking occasional breaks from work, prioritise moments that strengthen your bond.
Align on Parenting Approaches:
Extend the importance of being on the same page beyond conception to child-rearing. Present a united front as parents, avoiding divisive tactics that could undermine your partnership. Additionally, embrace the attractiveness of fathers actively engaging with their children.
Avoid Chore Comparisons:
Rather than engaging in fruitless comparisons of daily tasks, view chores as the path of least resistance. Let go of the notion of keeping score, recognizing that maintaining a harmonious relationship is more important than determining who did more around the house.
Express Love Beyond Intimacy:
Show affection regularly and find ways to express love beyond moments of intimacy. Whether through thoughtful gestures, love notes, or simply spending quality time together, cultivate an environment where love is consistently demonstrated.
As an alternative to the Valentine’s Day frenzy, adopt a year-round approach to romance. By spreading out acts of love and kindness over 365 days, couples can build a stronger, more resilient connection. Celebrate the unique bond between partners with thoughtful gestures that go beyond the confines of a single day.
And for those looking to navigate Valentine’s Day differently, one husband shares his 21-year tradition of expressing love to his wife through heartfelt gestures, proving that lasting romance extends far beyond the confines of a calendar date.
Television host Deloris Frimpong Manso, widely known as Delay, displayed a perplexed expression as music duo Micheal Boafo popularly known as B2, and Tony Boafo known as Twist known collectively as DopeNation explained their single status on her show.
The twins, despite their fame, attributed their relationship skepticism to the belief that love is a facade, leaving Delay visibly taken aback.
“Most people who are in love happen to be in a situation where it’s all in their heads. You feel happy about it but for that same momentum you have with feeling happy, you can feel very sad the day you’ll be heartbroken,” they said as they seamlessly completed each other’s sentences,” DopeNation stated.
During the discussion, the duo shared their perspective on love, emphasising that it often exists only in one’s mind.
They deemed it a “scam,” asserting that commitment comes with a hefty price, especially in terms of emotional investment and potential heartbreak.
“So, we feel like it’s a scam. It’s a scam because it’s only real when you believe in it. When you don’t believe in it, it’s like a facade,” they added, stressing that, “Being committed to someone is expensive” because “you may not know their whereabouts and activities when you are away from you.”
Furthermore, DopeNation revealed their unconventional family background, asserting they were born out of wedlock and only encountered their estranged father at the age of fourteen.
Despite efforts to foster a continuous familial bond, their intentional mention of him in the interview prompted a rare response from their father, leading to a conversation.
The twins expressed the challenges in maintaining a relationship with their father, citing periods of silence after reconnecting and addressing issues.
Despite these hurdles, they expressed a desire to visit him in the future.
The High Court at Cape Coast has issued a directive to former Education Minister Professor Dominic Fobih, urging him to pardon his son and nephew for their objections to his marriage to a 30-year-old woman, Mary Nyamekye Oduro.
In a recent ruling reported by Dennislaw.com, the court declared that there were no valid grounds for the opposition raised against the 80-year-old professor’s union with Mary Nyamekye, whom he loves.
The case, which gained widespread public attention and controversy in May 2023 following the viral video of the former minister’s traditional wedding, saw objections based on concerns about the significant age gap between Professor Fobihand his bride, as well as doubts about Mary’s intentions.
Objectors argued that the marriage was irrational, citing Professor Fobih’s recovery from a stroke and the perceived potential for marital discord due to the age difference. They also expressed suspicions about Mary’s motives, alleging infidelity and manipulation.
Furthermore, claims regarding a prior engagement with one Beatrice Boateng were addressed by the court, confirming that the marriage had been dissolved and dismissing the objectors’ arguments as unsubstantiated.
Ultimately, the court ruled in favour of Professor Fobih and Mary Nyamekye, dismissing the objections as lacking merit. In addition, the court urged Professor Fobih to forgive his son, Dr. Nick Fobih, and nephew, Nicholas Fobih, and imposed financial penalties of GHC20,000 and GHC 20,000 on the objectors, respectively.
The ruling marks a resolution to the highly publicized dispute surrounding Professor Fobih’s marriage, emphasizing the importance of legal recourse and the protection of individuals’ right to marry based on mutual consent and affection.
As the case concludes, attention now shifts to the aftermath of the court’s decision and the potential reconciliation between Professor Fobih and his family members, as well as the ongoing journey of the newlywed couple as they navigate their future together.
Navigating the male psyche can be a mystery for many, but understanding the little gestures that bring joy to men can foster a strong and lasting connection. Here are key ways to make your man feel loved daily:
Let Him Make You Laugh:Men often seek external validation, and making them feel appreciated externally can be significant. Laughter is a powerful tool, providing validation and creating a sense of joy in the relationship. Let your man know that his humor is appreciated, fostering a deeper connection.
Acknowledge His Giving: Men often express love through giving, and acknowledging their efforts is crucial. Whether it’s a gift or a thoughtful gesture, appreciate the intention and effort behind it. Recognizing his giving nature builds a sense of love and appreciation in the relationship.
Let Him Help You: While women are natural caregivers, allowing men to contribute and take charge is equally essential. Balance the responsibilities in the relationship, and let your man take the lead in certain aspects. Acknowledge his efforts, fostering a sense of teamwork and shared responsibility.
Lead with Your Feminine Energy: Embrace the feminine energy within you, allowing your man to feel strong and protective. While modern society promotes equality, acknowledging primal instincts can deepen the emotional connection. Softness and nurturing qualities can make your man feel strong and loved.
Let Him Know When He Finds Your ON Button: Physical intimacy is a crucial aspect of making men feel loved and connected. Communicate what turns you on, guiding your man to understand your desires. When he discovers your “ON button,” it creates a win-win situation, enhancing intimacy and strengthening the bond.
Understanding these subtle ways to make your man feel loved can contribute to a happy and healthy relationship.
Let’s abandon the rose-colored glasses for a grounded view of love’s evolution.
Love, a term often casually used and occasionally misinterpreted, poses intriguing questions. What truly defines it? How does it transform with time? Is love purely a result of chemistry, or does it develop into something more profound? The answers to these questions remain elusive.
Psychologists propose a five-stage model for the unfolding of love. Introduced by Professor Arthur Aron, this framework aims to chart the journey from initial butterflies in the stomach to an uncertain destination. The ultimate outcome is largely unpredictable.
Stage 1: Infatuation
This is the “honeymoon phase,” where you’re head over heels in love with your special someone. You’re obsessed with their smile, their laugh, their very existence. It’s intense, exciting, and…temporary.
Sadly, this feeling, fueled by hormones like dopamine and oxytocin, making you feel as high as a stoner, never lasts. Butterflies can’t fly forever.
Stage 2: Intimacy
As the initial frenzy settles, we enter stage two – intimacy. This is where you get to know each other, flaws and all. You share secrets, dreams, fears, and vulnerabilities. You slowly build a foundation of trust and understanding; like a safe space.
As the intense passion of early romance subsides, you develop a deeper connection with your partner; a feeling of strong attachment and contentment. The sex might not be as wild, but it’s deeply satisfying.
Stage 3: Disillusionment
This is the phase where we begin to see things as they truly are. Our temporary colour blindness to those glaring red flags finally clears off.
You might be faced with different opinions, habits, or even dealbreakers. The rose-coloured glasses come off, and we see each other clearly.
It is a bumpy phase, and sadly, many relationships never make it past this third stage.
Stage 4: Commitment
If your love survives stage three, congratulations! You’ve survived the storm and entered the fourth stage – commitment.
This stage is about choosing each other and building a future together. You’re weathering a storm and emerging stronger, knowing you can face anything as a team. You stand by each other through thick and thin and pick each other up when you fall. It’s about “we,” not just “me” and “you.” You both decided to make it work, and it worked.
Stage 5: Companionship
Remember those butterflies you felt in stage one? They might return, but in a different form. This new phase is both a comfortable and fulfilling one. It’s a quiet assurance that your partner is your rock, your confidante and best friend. You understand each other, respect each other, and simply enjoy being together.
Not many couples reach this phase, but those who do are the ones who patiently and consciously work on their relationship.
While it’s important to remember that every individual is unique and may express their feelings differently, there are some common signs that can indicate when a lady is in love. Here are seven signs to look out for:
She prioritizes your happiness: When a woman is in love, she genuinely cares about your well-being and happiness. She will go out of her way to make you smile and feel content, even if it means sacrificing her own comfort.
She wants to spend time with you: Love often prompts a desire for togetherness. If she frequently wants to spend time with you, whether it’s going on dates, watching movies, or simply being in each other’s company, it’s a strong sign of affection.
She’s a good listener: When a lady is in love, she pays close attention to what you say. She’s genuinely interested in your thoughts, feelings, and experiences. You’ll notice that she remembers details from your conversations.
She shows affection: Love often leads to physical affection, such as holding hands, hugging, or cuddling. If she initiates physical contact or responds warmly to your gestures of affection, it’s a sign she cares deeply.
She introduces you to her inner circle: When a woman is in love, she wants you to be a part of her life and will introduce you to her friends and family. This is a significant step, as it indicates a desire for a long-term connection.
She’s supportive: Love involves being there for each other through thick and thin. If she offers emotional support during challenging times, encourages your goals and dreams, and celebrates your achievements, it’s a clear sign of love.
She says “I love you”: While actions often speak louder than words, the verbal expression of love is a powerful sign. When she says “I love you” and means it sincerely, it’s one of the most direct indications of her feelings.
Remember that communication is essential in any relationship. If you’re unsure about her feelings, it’s perfectly okay to have an open and honest conversation about your emotions and intentions.
Indeed, love is a word that is widely used and found throughout the world, including in religious texts like the Bible. However, despite its frequent use, it remains one of the most complex and least understood concepts.
The understanding and expression of love vary greatly among individuals, influenced by factors such as cultural background, age, gender, education, and life experiences. Each person’s unique perspective shapes their interpretation and experience of love. Love can take many forms, including romantic love, platonic love, familial love, and self-love, among others.
Due to its subjective nature, love’s true essence can be difficult to grasp and define universally. People often express love in diverse ways, and their interpretations may differ depending on their personal beliefs and experiences. This diversity in understanding and expression makes love an intriguing and multifaceted phenomenon that continues to be explored and pondered by people across the globe.
Consider the love story of a client.
He was driving when he saw this young, tall, fair and beautiful lady.
He suddenly lost control and drove into a ditch.
Among the onlookers who came to help was this lady.
He offered her a lift.
Things “started knocking things” and today they are married.
Interestingly, the lady claims she felt the same sensation when she first saw the man.
Some call this love at first sight.
What is love at first sight? You experience love at first sight when you feel romantic attraction for a stranger on seeing him or her for the first time.
You think you have seen the most romantic person on earth and will do everything, including smiling, greeting and making a kind offer to catch his or her attention.
You see him or her as flawless because you overlook all their weaknesses.
You admire them and want to follow them everywhere.
You are full of happiness and joy when this stranger is around you.
It is the most romantic thing that could happen to you in a short moment when someone comes straight into your heart and steals it away.
Some people do not believe in love at first sight.
According to scientists, when you see a person of the opposite sex, the brain stimulates a cocktail of chemicals like epinephrine in the nervous system.
This gives you a pleasant outlook on life and makes you react romantically towards him or her.
The greater stimulation, the greater your emotional feeling.
People then react differently depending on their age, sex and self-control.
What we call love, at first sight, is, therefore, nothing special because it could happen to anyone at any time.
Some further argue that people claiming to fall in love, at first sight, are already prepared to get into a relationship.
They are not attracted to just anyone but are selective in what they want.
In short, beautiful people attract attention.
This is normal because human beings, especially men, are visually stimulated.
Believing in love, at first sight, is simply a false sense of love because true love goes beyond.
Others believe in love at first sight.
In fact, 60 per cent of Americans believe in it and 50 per cent claim to have experienced it.
According to scientists, as we grow and imagine what we want in our future partners, those qualities are registered in our subconscious mind.
When you meet someone who has something similar to what is registered in your mind, you even feel you have known him or her for a long time.
This is love at first sight.
Scientists have found out that romantic love is rooted in our brains from infancy.
Romantic love, therefore, arches us backwards.
This makes a certain person feel right for us or feel familiar because he or she has something that activates our memory.
Some call it love at first sight.
If you believe in love at first sight or not, you are right because we are the choices we make in life.
Appreciate, however, that meeting someone for the first time does not guarantee a long and fulfilling relationship.
It only offers you the opportunity to find out if you are compatible.
The days after is what makes a difference.
Consider carefully the physical, ethical, mental and spiritual qualities of your potential lover.
Make sure you have compatible qualities.
Work hard on your weakness and ensure you can cope with them.
It is kind of amazing how a person who was once a stranger can suddenly be the person to steal your heart but don’t be afraid to fall in love even with a stranger because love is beautiful.
Love, at first sight, is possible, but it pays to take a second look.
Also remember, it takes time and patience to grow love.
Look before you leap.
Love can give you sight but it can also give you blindness.
Love is a complex emotion that can fill our hearts with joy, but when doubts arise about its authenticity, it can leave us feeling confused and hurt. If you suspect that your partner’s love might be pretence, it’s essential to pay attention to subtle signs that could validate your concerns. Here are five indicators that your partner may not genuinely love you:
1.Inconsistent Words and Actions: Pay attention to whether their words match their actions. True love is demonstrated through consistent affection, support, and care. If their actions contradict their declarations of love, it may be a red flag worth exploring further.
2.Avoidance of Communication: Open and honest communication is vital in any healthy relationship. If your partner avoids serious conversations and consistently uses busyness as an excuse, it could indicate a lack of genuine love and investment in the relationship.
3. Selfishness: A partner pretending to love you might exhibit selfish behavior, constantly putting their needs ahead of yours without considering your feelings. Love should involve a balance of give and take, not just one-sided self-centeredness.
4. Unnecessary Jealousy: While jealousy can be normal, excessive and irrational jealousy is a warning sign of a toxic partner. If they isolate you from loved ones or constantly monitor your activities, it may indicate underlying issues.
5. Inconsistency: If your partner’s affection fluctuates dramatically, going from loving to hostile, it can be confusing and emotionally draining. Genuine love remains steady and constant, even during difficult times.
Recognizing these subtle signs can help you assess the authenticity of your relationship and make informed decisions about your future. Remember that healthy relationships are built on trust, communication, and genuine care for each other’s well-being.
Renowned Nollywood actor Jim Iyke has recently discussed his troubled marriage, shedding light on his personal life.
The actor confessed that he transitioned from being a dedicated husband to his wife to becoming more focused on their young child.
He stated that he focused all his attention on taking care of his newborn son and totally ignored his wife.
Iyke attributed his sleeplessness and diminished sense of humor to the emotional impact of his mother’s passing.
He said that he ignored his wife completely in favor of giving their newborn baby his full attention.
According to him: “When I lost my mum I couldn’t find my feet for years, there is a lifestyle, understanding and spirituality. I just really wanted to live my life outside the world because the mistake was already made. Note it took them 72hrs to let me know she was dead.
“I am a product of love, my parents were so in love with each other. Just when I was getting over my loss, my woman got pregnant with my first son. Then I had a quiet space there was nobody to take care of anymore because that was my excuse to heal and there was nothing all of sudden. The loss hit me, I couldn’t sleep. I wasn’t the loving man she met, I am the prankster of the family. I don’t even get invited for family meetings because I make them laugh.
“I lost my sense of humor, I lost the lion in me, I gave myself to the elements and so she suffered for that. I became an obsessive dad, I took everything in me to my son, I was changing diapers, and I was the popular stay-at-home dad. I took everything to him and left her behind.
“I was a husband. I was an excellent father and woeful husband. After a while, she said I can’t find who I married. We are friends and I said if she can wait for me to get myself back I will appreciate but if she can’t I will understand. She said we can’t and we are friends.
“I went out of the country to find a place and I told them I couldn’t find myself so I went to a private beach, I cried and poured out my emotions. I went to other countries to chill with white kids and when I got back I said I am here again.”
He emphasizes that it is preferable to view someone as a friend rather than dating them and subsequently mistreating them.
In an interview with Amansan Krakye, Ephraim expresses that it is both selfish and greedy to date someone without genuine affection.
“If you don’t love someone you need to realize that though you don’t love the person you can be friends and it’ll be cool so I don’t need to go into a relationship and break the person’s heart,” he posited.
He added, “Maybe someone might give the person a better opportunity but because of greediness and selfishness so you want to have the person to yourself and maltreat the person.”
He said it is better to break things off after realizing you’re not emotionally invested in the relationship than wasting people’s time
“So if you know you won’t be able to get anywhere with the person just take the person as a friend and that’s all life is about and when we love each other you won’t do what will hurt your friend.
In four years, a woman who gambled on a delivery man hasn’t looked back.
The adorable tale was shared on Twitter by user @traciafanclub, who revealed she welcomed a stranger into her home.
Not everyone supported the dodgy sushi’s stranger risk component, but they hoped it would continue to work.
A lady from America shared how she fell for the deliveryman, and her sweet story raised some red flags for people. High risk equals high reward, right?
Online dating and social media have made for some of the sweetest love stories, but it turns out that that is not the only form of technology bringing people together.
American woman shares how she fell for the delivery man
Twitter user @traciafanclub shared the cute story of how she and her man of four years met. Sis ordered some sushi and had a door dash man deliver it, not knowing she was about to meet her soul mate.
The man got lost, and so they started chatting. She felt so connected to the man that she ended up inviting him in, and the rest was history.
Read the full story below:
“He was my door dash driver and was having trouble finding my apartment so he called and the conversation flowed so naturally I ended up inviting him inside to eat the sushi I ordered from Shell gas station. We talked for hours and have been together every day since. It’s been four years.”
People share the red flags that went up for them while reading the love story
While it is cute and seemed to have worked out well, and some peeps were for it, many people clarified that they are never letting a stranger into their house, no matter how great the conversation is. Others also had a lot of questions about the sushi the good sis ordered from a petrol station, lol.
Read some of the comments:
@I_Am_Winter said:
“Let me order food.”
@nkaynnaji said:
“I think; I need to be kinder offer him sushi”
“I am not sure what was most scary; inviting a stranger into your home, or ordering sushi from a gas station?! I will go with sushi, gas station ”
@KhiyaElise said:
“I met an ex of mine at a grocery store. I wish it didn’t play out the way it did but the first six months were amazing. I hope y’all are able to stay together and love each other through thick and thin. Be kind, patient, and humble. Please ”
@Spexialk8 said:
“I was shocked that you said you let him in, but when you said you got sushi from the gas station it makes sense. Not scared of anything.”
Nairobi couple get married after 3 days
Separately, Godfrey and Pauline Mwakazi met on Tinder, and after day three, Godfrey was sure he wanted to spend the rest of his days with Pauline.
He proposed, and six years later they are still going strong. The couple shared that marriage has its fair share of problems, and they didn’t want to waste time after they knew they loved each other.
Godfrey came into the marriage with two kids from a previous marriage.
Source: msn.com
DISCLAIMER: Independentghana.com will not be liable for any inaccuracies contained in this article. The views expressed in the article are solely those of the author’s, and do not reflect those of The Independent Ghana
Three people have been remanded in police custody for the alleged murder of a 28-year-old lady at Dwinase near Kokotro in the Bekwai Municipality of the Ashanti region.
Prime suspect, Mary Akosua Agyemang, 25 years, is alleged to have accosted the deceased, 28-year-old Vida Ennin, for gossiping about her over a man they have both dated.
The two women got into a brawl, Sunday evening, over who rightfully deserves to be the fiancée of the man, an excavator operator.
Mary is said to have left the scene of the brawl to buy a sharp knife. She allegedly returned to stab Vida in the face, breast and palm. She bled to death.
The Bekwai police later arrested Mary, also known as Serwaa, together with two others – Felicia Sarpong, 61 years and Ernest Achirem, 63 years – accused of attempting to shield Mary from arrest.
The deceased Vida Ennin
All three were arraigned before the Bekwai Circuit Court on Wednesday and have been remanded in police custody to assist in investigations.
Even if you and your partner, are still very much in love, there are always ways to make that flame burn even stronger. Certain things just remind you of how you felt about him or her when you first met, like revisiting your early date spots and looking through old photos together.
It’s healthy to bring out those feelings again even before you feel like that honeymoon phase is long gone. Continuously finding new ways to love each other will help make your relationship last. So whether you want to bring back the spark or fall even deeper, check out these 10 ways to fall in love all over again.
Here are seven telltale signals that you are prepared for a relationship as someone who is not opposed to being in one.
You are happy
You are happy and comfortable being friends with yourself. If you are, it will be easier to be comfortable being around your partner.
Your emotions are stable
An emotionally immature or unstable person is often advised to avoid being in a relationship. If you are emotionally mature and stable, this is a sign that you are ready for a relationship. Being emotionally stable in this context does not mean there is no room to improve.
You are ready to be vulnerable to another
You are ready for a relationship when you are open to being vulnerable to your partner. Being vulnerable requires letting go and allowing another individual to have a level of effect on you that not many people have. It also means you are ready to share your good and not-so-good sides with another person. Why be in a relationship when you aren’t ready to be open with others? A relationship is not an isolation space but a space for close contact, including with your worst and best personalities.
You know
Another good sign is that you are certain it’s a good time to be in one. Being certain or “knowing” its time can happen based on the stage or phase of life you are at the moment. It could also be triggered by meeting someone you believe is the right person to start a relationship with. When you know, go for it. More so, when you acknowledge the need not to be alone, you are on the verge of finding a partner.
Your financial habits are healthy
You have a healthy financial life or habit. You are not willing to be a burden you your partner, whether male or female, right? Hence, your sense of independence financially is another sure sign you are ready to take on an extra financial commitment that is not in any way related to making money. Usually, financial stability is a major sign for many men to realise they are ready for a partner; meanwhile, for many women who are intentional about their lives, they see financial independence as a major yardstick for them ever to consider being a relationship with another. If you tick this requirement as a man or woman, you are ready for a relationship. Love is sweet, but when money enters, love is sweeter, right?
You are whole
Do you have a healthy mindset toward being in a relationship? Have you healed from past hurts directly or indirectly inflicted on you? If your answer to both questions is yes, there is a sign that you are ready to be in a relationship.
You are over a breakup
You are ready when you are sure and not sentimental about the fact that you are over a breakup and will not ruin your relationship with baggage from your previous relationship. Above all, be better, handle your issues, and be the person you would love your partner to be.
Maintaining a healthy and happy relationship requires effort and commitment from both partners.
However, some common behaviours can lead to serious consequences and even ruin the relationship.
In this article, we will discuss three serious things that couples do that can damage their relationship and provide insights on how to avoid them.
Communication breakdown: A couple’s relationship can be severely damaged when communication breaks down. Couples need to communicate effectively, sharing their thoughts, feelings, and needs with one another.
Without effective communication, misunderstandings and hurt feelings can occur, leading to dissatisfaction in the relationship. Bottling up one’s emotions can have explosive consequences. When a partner can no longer hold on to their issues, they may explode in ways that can either end the relationship or make it stronger.
To prevent this, it’s crucial to create an environment in which partners can open up and share their doubts and worries. By doing so, they can strengthen their relationship and deepen their bond.
Lack of trust: Trust is a crucial element in any healthy relationship, and its absence can cause significant damage. Betrayals, such as lying or cheating, can trigger feelings of anger, resentment, and mistrust, ultimately leading to the relationship’s demise.
Effective communication is key to maintaining the trust and preventing betrayal in a relationship. It’s essential to avoid giving your partner any reason to doubt you, such as hiding your phone when they’re nearby. Such behaviour can raise suspicion and damage trust.
Additionally, it’s important to avoid closing yourself off to your partner when you’re dealing with issues. Instead, communicate with your partner and work through the problems together. By doing so, you can strengthen your bond and build a more solid foundation of trust.
Neglecting the relationship: Inattentiveness is a serious threat to the success of any romantic relationship. Neglecting the bond between two people can manifest in a variety of ways, including insufficient quality time, disregard for each other’s desires, or becoming content and assuming the relationship will remain as is.
If couples allow their relationship to fall into neglect, they may be unwittingly signing their death warrant. It is crucial to prioritize and invest in the relationship to keep it alive and thriving and to ensure a future together.
Finally, a breakdown in communication, a lack of trust, and neglecting the relationship are three serious issues that can destroy a couple’s relationship. Couples must recognize these issues early on and take proactive steps to address them before they escalate.
Maintaining open and honest communication, building and maintaining trust, and consistently prioritizing the relationship are key to fostering a healthy and long-lasting partnership. By being aware of these potential pitfalls, couples can take action to keep their relationship strong and fulfilling.
You know the relationship was toxic, but for some reason, you can’t help but miss them, pine over them, and hope for them to change. Or, you might stay in a dead-end relationship because it hurts too much to leave.
First, to clarify, when I say dead-end relationship, I mean a relationship that involves an attachment to someone who is painfully unattainable (perhaps they are emotionally unavailable, they don’t want a committed relationship, or they are already married). This doesn’t necessarily mean that this person is evil or has bad intentions, but it means you and your partner are on two completely different wavelengths, and this is a chronic pattern, not a blip.
If you logically know you’re in a dead-end relationship, then why the hell is it so hard to let go of them? Well, you just might be addicted your ex. Here are some ways to find out.
You have a compulsive drive to remain connected to a particular person. Whether this is your ex that you were with for years, or the person you just went on a few dates with. You feel a drive to connect even if you know it’s bad for you, but can’t seem to control the urge and reaction to that urge.
Panic at any signs of a threat to the connection
You feel overwhelming panic if you sense that the connection might be threatened or if you can’t get your beloved’s attention or affection. This might cause you to react in ways that violate your own values and boundaries. You might call/text the person even though they have disrespected you or are not responding. You feel humiliated and ashamed, but you can’t seem to help but keep trying different things to make the person react and give you attention.
Intense withdrawal
You feel intense withdrawal symptoms. While it’s natural to feel sad after a separation and to miss the person and the relationship, you suffer a degree of agony where you feel like you’ve completely fallen apart and the only way to feel better is to get a ‘fix’ by going back to the person. The craving overrides all sense of sensibility and rational thought. In an almost unconscious state, you’ll do whatever it takes to satiate the craving.
Feeling incomplete
Beneath all these different hallmarks of addiction is a sense of incompleteness and not feeling whole, and the only way to fill that hole is to fill it with the validation of someone else. This person becomes the center of your universe in which you orbit around, and you’ll do whatever it takes, despite the negative consequences to maintain the connection.
If this describes your attachment to your ex or someone you’re dating, it may be an indicator that you are in a relationship where the addictive elements have become so intense that it’s controlling your ability to make healthy choices. The overwhelming compulsion to stay connected comes at a cost for your longterm happiness and emotional well being. The first step to breaking your addiction is recognizing that this is an issue and that yes, you’re hooked on someone despite it’s negative toll on your well being. The next step is learning the tools to shift your patterns.
Remember, it takes two people with unresolved issues to make a dysfunctional relationship function. Our relationship patterns follow us wherever we go. Your patterns do not change unless you do the work to change them.
Actress and entrepreneur Yvonne Nelson has shared her views about love and life in an interview with Accra-based Power FM over the weekend.
She described love as a scam to the extent that more often than not it was conditional, at least per her experiences.
“What you see on the screen is acting,” she responded to the host before delving into the issue of love: “Love is a scam (in reality) and we all know it, isn’t it so?”
She explained further: “I think love is a scam because we are all deceitful. If a person talks about love, there is something they are seeking, be it money or sex; it is conditional so it is a scam.”
In her opinion, love is the route through which men have often lied to women: “It is just a way of telling you that I want something from you and so they just use the word love and it is usually the ladies being lied to by the men.”
Asked a point-bank question about whether she was not in love, she responded: “Love, I am sorry, I am not there yet. I used to love but it was like a joke. It is a scam,” she emphasised.
Carlos was the man I had always dreamt about. I saw him in my thoughts, my sleep and whenever my eyes were opened, he was all I saw.
His dark skin sparkled like a starry night, ooh I call him my ebony black. Each time he said my name, Janet, I could feel the love he had for me.
On our usual evening strolls, when other men looked at me, he looked at them with a gaze which they immediately read as, back off- she is my wife.
You are wondering how I knew, ooh one of my several admirers told me so.
Carlos’ lips had the right words. There are days which I considered as bad, obviously, making me very frustrated. Upon return home he had the perfect words to make me smile again.
And oh! He was Dumelo’s height with a well-built body. His face was masculine, his facial hair perfectly blended with his dark brows marching his well-connected beard, to top it all, his face was smooth – what Ghanaian Gen Z’s call a “fine boy no pimples”.
He was all this and most importantly, a perfect gentleman. You might say because he is my husband, I will certainly have nothing but praises for him. Nevertheless, I can confidently say he is the reason my life looked and felt good.
I am sure you know that feeling when good things seem to be happening and you never want them to change -yes, that is the life I live now.
My life was not always this way, never in my wildest dream did I believe I could get married to a man I could talk to for hours, drink from the cup in his hands or lean back against and breathe.
Here is a quick story of my life before now.
At age 20, I was already looking like a mini Karshadian – perfect brown skin, no wrinkles, slender and of average height and very eloquent.
I carried myself with confidence, a great public speaker and naturally I walked like a professional model.
I was an adventurous, smart and good student who lived recklessly yet managed to emerge top of my class for three consecutive years of the Banking and Finance class at the university
Like most bad girls, I had two abortions for one of the two guys I dated whom I thought I loved. The guys were sweet, at least that is what my naive mind kept telling me.
On special days, my very first guy would go the extra mile to shower me with gifts. From the latest phones and dinner dates at fancy restaurants, to nights in luxury hotels which of course was my favorite of all. I called him Mr. Surprises.
I vividly remember telling him, “You are all I want,” (now I look back and laugh). After what seemed like a dream I never wanted to wake up from, were days I was treated as though I was non-existent.
He wouldn’t call neither would he return my calls because he was supposedly busy. Mr Surprises seemed available on special days or occasions- I wanted a deeper relationship. I got tired of waiting for special days to feel loved. Fortunately, I met a man in his early 30s.
Where my Mr Surprises fell short, he stood tall and exceled effortlessly. He called first thing in the morning and last at night. He had my attention. I was beginning to imagine our future together, of course, I took these thoughts to bed.
In my dream we were already married with kids, it looked so real… I woke up on the morrow very excited especially because we planned to spent some time together over dinner.
That evening at the restaurant, his phone kept ringing severally from the same number. I noticed he got uneasy at the sight of the call and quickly excused himself to answer it. Upon return to the table, I saw fear in his eyes.
I could not feign ignorance, so I quizzed and he told me his daughter had an accident adding that she was in the hospital. At the mention of daughter, I froze! Yo…ur, you..r what!
He looked at me sternly and said let’s talk about it later, let me take you back to your hotel. I still love you.
I quickly found my voice and replied “you can go, I will find my way.” He paid the bill and left Ghs1000 on the table, kissed me on the forehead and said, “I am sorry,” then walked away.
His words shuttered and broke me to the core. There were so many questions. Why did he make me feel as though I was most important and that there was no one but me in his life. I can’t believe I am a fool; I can’t believe I couldn’t read through the lines.
Come to think of it, I was still dating Mr Surprises yet l accepted another’s proposal. I think I am the same as the married man…well if he makes me happy and fills the gaps in my life, what’s the use. I better manage him that way.
The next day he came to my hostel at dawn. I quickly got dressed and followed him to a breakfast restaurant. We sat to discuss the way forward but of course, I didn’t tell him I had Mr. Surprises in my life.
My journey with the married man went on and ooh he worked hard to prove himself. He made sure to be there for me. Sometimes, he would take me to the campus, send lunch and gifts.
One morning, I heard a knock on my hostel door, I knew it was the married man because it was just like him. I got all excited and rushed towards the door with my face full of smiles as I turned the nod I noticed it was his wife! Why on earth will she be at my door and how did she get her. I knew she was his wife because I had seen her pictures on his phone.
The lady started speaking on top of her voice and warned that I leave her husband adding that she was pregnant. After that sentence I couldn’t hear anything she said, I was also pregnant for him. As I stared at her, she became blurry because my concentration shifted to Mr Surprises, I looked away for a while and looked at him again only to realise that he was actually staring at me. He walked up to the lady to apologize and promised that I would leave her husband.
I was too ashamed to utter any word so I watched Mr Suprises with one question running through my brain, “how did I get here?”
To my utmost surprise, his first question was “why will you cheat on me with a married man?”
I still had not found my voice to reply. He forced me to call the married man to end everything which I obliged. After all, I still had him.
After what appeared to me as hours of endless conversation, he said showed me the ring he intended to propose to me with… then I knew, I had messed up at big time. I shamefully went on my knees to apologize but he told me, it would be difficult to marry me because I had broken his trust.
That’s how he ended everything. I watched him stand to his feet and leave my room. I cried my eyes out.
My married boyfriend would not return my calls neither would Mr Surprises. Jezz, I saw my life flash before my eyes. I was pregnant, single and in my final year of school.
Suicidal thoughts? Yes!
What was I going to do? Abortion, definitely. I gathered my savings and underwent my second abortion for the same person, the married man.
I gathered my depressed self out of the hospital bed to the hospital chapel to pray.
“God, I know I don’t deserve a second chance but please save me from myself. I have nothing else. All those who said they loved me have left. I don’t want to use my own hands to take my life, help me. Amen”
I picked my sunglasses and headed to the door before I knew it I bumped into someone. Out of shame and disgust for myself, I quickly apologized and walked off.
He chased after me and as I was about entering my car he introduced himself. All I thought that moment was “what do I care about your name?”
Leave me alone. All the while, I had not looked at him because I was in no mood to go through another man drama.
I told him, I was Janet and quickly drove off.
Two months into my service, I decided to treat myself to a nice dinner. After work I went to this fancy restaurant as I ate my meal a gentleman walked to my table and called my name out, Janet.
I looked at him and asked myself, “where do I know you?”
Before I realised, he sat down and ordered a meal. He talked about himself asked about me, though I was reserved that night I liked his company. He paid for my meal though.
That was Carlos, I enjoyed his company and a year later we became great friends. I even had the confidence to tell him of my terrible past expecting him to walk out on me, but he held me by the hand and asked that I hugged him and whispered into my ears “all is well”.
Two months down the line, he asked that I become his girlfriend and of course I said yes.
A month later, he asked that I marry him. I told him, I wasn’t worthy of his love because he was too perfect and I didn’t deserve it.
We got married and I can tell you it was the best decision I made. My life has never been the same afterwards. He loved me so much and I could tell it was genuine
If you ask me, I don’t deserve the kind of love he shallowed on me.
Carlos is a representation of the love Christ has for you. No matter what you have been through, no matter what you have done, he is always there to help you.
To pick you up from the grass and change your name like Carlos did mine.
As we celebrate Jesus whose birth brought joy to the world, remember that you are greatly loved and for everyone who is loved, you are expected to show love.
Extend the same love to others.
Merry Christmas
Remember that you are loved.
–
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, business, events and incidents are the products of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental
POV: you just got home from an incredible Hinge date. You’re straight up weak in the knees and smiling non-stop as you close your front door – it basically feels like one of those just-met-the-love-of-my-life moments in a rom-com. You already feel the urge to say the big “L” word, even though you just met this person, like, tonight. You’re wondering: how long does it take to actually fall in love, anyway? Is it possible you’re falling too fast?
No matter your romantic sitch, it’s totally normal to think about how long it takes to fall in love. The important thing, though? You should know that falling in love is different for *everyone*, explains clinical psychologist and sex therapist Janet Brito, PhD, founder of the Hawaii Center for Sexual and Relationship Health.
“It all just depends on the individuals, the circumstances, and the environment that they’re in,” Brito says. So just because one person falls in love quickly doesn’t mean it’ll be the same for others, ya know? That said, this doesn’t make approaching the question of falling in love (or lust) any darn easier. Like, is it sexual tension or a crush? What are the actual signs you’re falling in love?
These are the hard-hitting Q’s, and Cosmo is here to help. The following is everything you need to know about how long it takes to fall in love, according to relationship experts and research.
First, how do you define “falling in love” anyway?
Before you dive into the logistics, you should probably make sure you’re clear on what it means to “fall in love” in the first place. Among other things, “falling in love is a process of understanding and coming to love a whole human’s values, philosophies, history, challenges, and eccentricities,” explains Jenni Skyler, PhD, director of The Intimacy Institute. In short, falling in love can feel intense and overwhelming, but it’s also the process of feeling a closeness and acceptance of a person’s ~entire being~.
Per experts and research, this is (basically) how long it takes to fall in love
People have been studying and contemplating the world of love since time immemorial. Among other things, some of the (warning: very gender binary-heavy!) research out there indicates that men think about confessing their love when they’re about 97 days into a relationship, while women can take about 149 days, says one 2011 study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
In heterosexual relationships, while they may not verbalise it, research shows that men tend to fall in love faster than women, according to a 2010 study published in the Evolutionary Psychology journal. In relationships between two women-identifying folks, declarations of love were exchanged between partners by around roughly six months into the relationship, says a 2008 study published in the Journal of Gay & Lesbian Social Services.
That said, note this: there are other studies out there that also contradict these notions, so overall research is pretty inconclusive and, yup, dated. Experts continue to assert that how long it takes to fall in love is different for everyone, explains Brito.
Reasons you might fall in love quickly
How quickly you fall in love can also depend on additional factors, Skyler says. Some of those reasons include but are not limited to…
Your attachment style. For starters, “people with anxious attachment styles fall in love really easily,” Skyler says. Those with an anxious attachment style might feel like they “need” their partner in order to feel secure, Skyler explains, which is why they might be more open to falling in love and forming a relationship than most. Those with an avoidant attachment style tend to, well, avoid those touchy feel-y, emotions, Skyler says. “They have a block, a wall up. They can still fall in love, just not immediately or as quickly,” she explains.
Have you had sex? Yep, falling in love can also depend on whether or not you’ve already had sex with this person. (Or people!) Even though you might be cool with casual sex, bringing intercourse into the mix can make you catch feelings for someone that much faster, since it adds another layer of intimacy into the equation that can bring you closer to the big “L,” Skyler says. But again, remember, everyone’s different.
They remind you of your parents. “Usually we fall in love quickly when someone reminds us subconsciously of our parents,” Skyler says. Why? This person can seem familiar and safe, making you feel closer to them than you might actually be and, in turn, making you fall in love faster. (Kinda odd, but makes sense.)
Okay, but what about love at first sight?
Yes, it’s certainly possible to fall in love at first sight, though it’s uncommon. “Usually what people consider to be ‘love at first sight’ is actually sexual attraction,” Skyler says. From that attraction, sometimes the stars align and the person you’re attracted to ends up being your marital partner, Skyler notes – which largely contributes to the love at first sight phenomenon.
That said, some research indicates that the body’s cerebral networks associated with love can activate within one fifth of a second of meeting a person, according to a study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine. And yep, other research from the Journal of Neuroscience indicates that people decide within seconds whether or not they’re interested in someone. Does this equate to *true love* at first sight? Not exactly, but it shows that it is possible to have a strong draw to someone upon first encounter.
All in all, everyone is different when it comes to how long it takes to fall in love – so try not to stress out about timing and just focus on the relationship itself instead, Brito says. K?
If you want to get successful at business, look at those who already nailed it, watch, and learn their strategies and habits, and attitude. If you want to get good at running, take advice from runners who have already gone through it all. There are great lessons in someone else’s success, and even if not all of them can be applied to your life, the main points will be something to learn from.
Similarly, when it comes to relationships, we can learn a lot from those around us who made them. Those friends who are still together after everyone else already divorced, those that managed to keep the fire, and those who still talk kindly to each other even after an argument.
There are only a few basic notions that need to click in a relationship, the rest is commitment and hard work from both parties.
But there is one more thing I noticed, observing the well-functioning couples around me — in my family, and among my friends. Although the sample I am looking at is far from complete, what I observed is that in each (cisHet) relationship that is successful and has the potential to last forever, it’s always the man who is more interested.
It’s not that the women aren’t, they are too, but there is a slight imbalance between the two. And this imbalance has been there from the first second.
In the relationships I see thriving, it was always the guy wanting it more, it was him pursuing, him wanting to commit, him wanting to get married and have kids and settle down forever. These are the guys who talk about their wives as “my beautiful wife”, and “love of my life” instead of calling them wifey and my partner.
These are the guys who are proud of what she accomplishes. These are the guys who stand up to their mothers and prioritize family over their friends. The guys who love more.
Editor’s Note: This is a part of YourTango’s Opinion section where individual authors can provide varying perspectives for wide-ranging political, social, and personal commentary on issues.
Traditional relationship roles
Even my feminist friends, those who deeply believe in equality and demand it from their partner and from everyone around — them in their relationship are going for the traditionally more feminine role. The one to be taken care of — now not financially but emotionally. The one that receives — and not only provides. The one that likes to give over the driving seat in their romantic lives — as they are making enough decisions in the professional ones.
This caters to the masculine needs of men, to be in control, to show they can provide, and to take care of the one they love.
The strange thing here is that this should be the normal setup in every relationship, this kind of equality and balance. Yet if the man is not as committed to it as the woman, the woman will be perceived as bossy, needy, and controlling. It takes a man in love to understand that his girlfriend is not emasculating him but is participating in the relationship with thoughts, decisions, and conversations.
Men are willing to grow — but not for everyone.
There have been quite a few studies recently that single men have a hard time keeping up with single women. The latter are healing their traumas and traumas of generations, they work on themselves, they go to therapy, they learn to communicate assertively — and they don’t need a man but want a partner. Women go through self-development for themselves.
Men (not all men, but most) usually go through self-development when it comes to business and productivity, not relationships.
They often fail to acknowledge that they would need healing or therapy, so they fall into the routine of looking for external approval from different sources — such as binge-dating. Unless they find someone that they are really interested in (in love or even obsessed with) they wouldn’t change even for their committed partner, as they get the necessary feedback and they don’t push themselves further — from an emotional maturity point of view.
Relationships need growth, from both parties, especially because women tend to grow and men need to keep up. If the man is unwilling, the woman will quickly outgrow him and the conflicts will never stop.
Men are willing to listen — but not to everyone
Why do you think there is a saying that there is no one on earth paying more attention to you than the man who hasn’t yet had sex with you? Because there is an unquenched thirst from his side that makes him want more, know more, and hear more. And it’s a really great feeling.
This doesn’t necessarily go away after the first sexual encounter, but this wanting and incessant attention only stays if the man is really interested, and more interested than the woman. It probably helps too, if she is out of his league a bit. It is not about women playing hot and cold — but guess what, they do it to keep him wanting more, otherwise he leaves or disappears.
But if he wants, he listens. If he cares, he asks those questions. If he wants to be in her life, he is making her a priority. They will listen, and they will pay attention — but in the long run only if they are more in love.
The thrill of the chase
My theory is that it is because of the thrill of the chase, the appeal of the uncertain and unattainable — even within a committed relationship. Being afraid to lose someone is the biggest motivator to better yourself, listen and pay attention. Being scared to fall out of the good graces of someone you are invested in can stop you from being ignorant and uncaring.
If they are too comfortable and getting everything they need without having to fight for it (there are different ways to fight, not only chasing) the value decreases, and their interest wanes.
And this is when women get too clingy. This is when we are labeled needy. This is when we get ghosted. And this is exactly why a lot of women play too hard to get. This is why we play hot and cold. Because if you give everything without men having to achieve it, they just lose interest and jump to the next subject which is more of a challenge.
Might be a blanket statement, but men only go out of their way to learn the other’s love language, and their ways of preferred being if they care enough to. They only commit if they are interested enough. It’s not good or bad, it just is.
And yes, not all men. I am pretty sure that there are a few exceptions — and pretty sure they are taken and happy in their relationship, where they build a brilliant life with a woman they are still madly in love with — more than she is in lovewith them.
If there is anything to take away from this, is that for women, it is beneficial to look for a slight emotional imbalance in the relationship, and find a guy who is more invested than they are. A guy who loves more. From the get-go.
Men feel more alive and willing to do more if they have to face a challenge. If they are in love. If they have to fight for the woman.
The problem is that women also want to feel alive, and madly in love. They want to give everything. And that chemistry and those fireworks… aah. But my opinion is, that a woman can grow to love a man who she only likes, but a man can only commit to a woman if he is obsessed enough from the very first minute.
It’s not fair. But it’s good to know.
[Disclaimer: I do not want to hurt anyone’s feelings with anything I write. I do reserve the right though to have my opinion, and it’s fine if you don’t agree.]
It was summer 1984. Grace, a recent college graduate in her early 20s, had put all her savings towards a long distance flight from her home in Washington DC to visit her Australian boyfriend, John Hiron.
The couple met at a party earlier that year, a few days before John was supposed to be leaving town. The early days of their relationship were a whirlwind — after falling for Grace, John extended his trip for as long as possible.
They were, as Grace puts it, “super head-over-heels madly in love.” But eventually John’s visa ran out, and he had to go home. After that, Grace and John’s relationship was confined to letters. Their snail mail took weeks to travel overseas, and the physical distance between them created an emotional distance that was hard to bridge.
As her departure date approached, Grace started to worry.
“I had a dream that I was making a huge mistake,” Grace tells CNN Travel today. “I just had a really bad gut feeling I shouldn’t go.”
It didn’t help that Grace, “was not an adventure taker,” as she puts it. Looking for reassurance, Grace spontaneously called John. The couple rarely spoke on the phone due to the hefty long-distance charges, but she was feeling increasingly desperate.
“I needed him to say, ‘You’re doing the right thing,’” she recalls. “But he wasn’t home.”
They fell in love in the 1980s but married other people. 23 years later they reconnected
Grace and John, pictured here in 1984, struggled to navigate a long-distance relationship.
Instead, John’s mother answered and said she’d pass on the message. It was over 36 hours before John phoned Grace back. In the interim, Grace’s anxiety only increased.
“Should I come?” Grace asked, when John eventually returned the call.
“If you want to,” was John’s response.
For Grace, this apparent nonchalance sealed the deal.
“I didn’t get on the plane,” she says. “And so he went to the airport to get me, to pick me up, and I didn’t get off — I wasn’t on the plane.”
“I said the wrong thing, without a doubt,” says John, who blames his immaturity. He wanted her to come, he says now, he just didn’t know how to express it and the long distance was tough.
When Grace didn’t turn up, John and his friends went straight from the airport to the pub. Over beers, his friends told John he’d meet someone else and move on. But John knew he’d lost something not easily replaced.
A few days later, he called Grace to ask her what went wrong. Over the grainy connection, Grace and John both struggled to articulate how they felt. Achieving a sense of closure felt impossible.
“I know we’re going to date other people, but we shouldn’t marry anyone else,” said Grace eventually, sensing the call — and their relationship — was coming to an end.
“Why?” asked John, thousands of miles away in his parent’s house in Perth.
“Because we’re never going to love someone the way we love each other,” said Grace.
Different directions
They fell in love in the 1980s but married other people. 23 years later they reconnected
Grace and John, pictured here in 1984, went their seperate ways after she decided not to get on the plane to be with him.
For months afterward, Grace says she felt “devastated.” But she tried not to imagine what life would be like if she’d boarded her flight. Instead, she “set about trying to move forward.”
“I bought a car with the money that I was going to go to Australia with, so that I couldn’t be tempted to change my mind later,” she says.
Months turned into years and John and Grace remained on the periphery of each other’s lives.
“I would call periodically,” says John. “One year I called, and she got married. And then I called again and her parents had died.”
Sometimes, John would phone and wouldn’t get through — Grace would have moved, and he’d struggle to track her down. There was no social media or email to aid this quest, and one time John phoned an international directory in the US to find Grace.
For Grace, these intermittent calls were bittersweet.
“I would swear, ‘l am not going to talk to him anymore. What is the point?’ along the way. Because it would stir up emotions,” she says.
“But every time he would call, I would take the call, of course. But I would swear this is the last time we’re going to talk.”
They fell in love in the 1980s but married other people. 23 years later they reconnected
Grace kept all of John’s letters.
The decades rolled on. Grace and John dated and then married other people, and later had children.
“Twenty-two years later, I’d long moved on from this relationship,” says Grace.
Even so, she’d kept all of John’s letters.
“I always had them wherever I went, whoever I was with, however many times I moved, the things that he gave me came along with me.”
Then, one day in January 2007, John called Grace out of the blue. The two hadn’t been in touch for some time. In the interim, they’d both been going through trying times — by coincidence, Grace had recently separated from her husband and John and his wife had also recently split.
“I said, ‘We’ve broken up and I’m not married anymore.’ And Grace said the same thing,” recalls John.
“That was really surprising that we were both separated,” says Grace.
The two talked for a short while, sharing how they were both feeling about their marriage breakdowns.
John mentioned a device called a webcam was becoming more commonplace — maybe they could video call sometime?
“I went to the local Staples, and I bought an external webcam, and I plugged it in and had to figure out how to use it,” says Grace. “And we saw each other for the first time in 22 years.”
The image was slightly pixelated, Grace took a moment to adjust to John’s gray hair — but despite the years, they both recognized one another right away.
“It’s funny how your mind tricks your eye, and you see the person from age 22, you don’t see the person who’s 45, in your mind, you see the young person,” says Grace. “And so from the minute we actually saw each other, it was super emotional — this almost visceral reaction.”
It was also a bit awkward.
“We didn’t really have a lot to talk about at first because what is there to talk about?” says Grace. “Just — ‘how are you doing with the divorce? How are the kids? How are you handling it?’ And helping each other through that, and kind of catching up on our lives and where we were and what was going on.”
Still, they arranged to speak again and over the next few months, they connected frequently by video call. Grace and John felt drawn to one another and their calls became a bright spot in both their lives.
“I’d get home from work, and we’d sit down and I’d be watching TV and the webcam was on and we’d talk for the night,” says John.
After a while, John suggested he could come to the US and they could reunite in person.
Grace was hesitant — was this a terrible idea? She raised the question with her marriage counselor, who suggested seeing John could bring about some much needed closure.
“She said, ‘This will be good for you to see each other, and you’ll never see each other again. So it’s kind of a very safe thing to do. You’re not going to get into something complicated, because how could you? You’re so far away.’ That was her advice. And that backfired…”
Reunited in the US
They fell in love in the 1980s but married other people. 23 years later they reconnected
Here’s Grace and John in 2008, when they were reunited in the US.
Grace picked John up from Newark Airport in March 2008. Waiting in a taxi with a bottle of champagne and chocolate covered strawberries, she found herself thinking about the day, all those years ago, that she didn’t get on the airplane.
When she saw John again, Grace says “it was like getting back a missing piece of myself that I hadn’t realized was lost for so long.”
“It was amazing. Very emotional,” says John of their reunion. “It was just about like no time had passed, it was all very familiar and comfortable.”
Before John’s arrival, Grace was worried there would be awkward silences. She’d prepared conversation topics, but these prompts turned out to be unnecessary. After just a few days together, the decades did seem to melt away. Grace and John started to discuss maybe meeting again in a year’s time.
But as they spent more time together, the two realized they were more than just old friends. The connection they’d felt in 1984 was still there, and waiting a year to reunite felt impossible.
“We were like, ‘Well, what are we going to do? Because now we can’t ever be apart again. We made a mistake — maybe we were young, maybe it was the right mistake and things worked out the way they were supposed to. But we can’t just go back to now being apart again,’” says Grace.
One evening, they reread the letters Grace had kept for all those years.
“It literally made us cry, to see the depth of emotion then, and that we could have let it slip away,” says Grace.
Then they found themselves recalling the phone conversation they’d had in 1984, right after Grace didn’t get on the plane.
“I said, ‘Wow, 22 years ago, I said we shouldn’t marry someone else.’ And he finished the sentence ‘….because we’ll never love somebody the way we love each other,’” says Grace,
“He remembered that — and that was like a stab in the heart of, ‘Okay, now, what are we going to do?’ This is going to be difficult and complicated.”
Grace and John lived on opposite sides of the globe. They were both going through divorces. They both had children they loved, and they wanted to be part of their lives. Following their hearts was complicated.
Still, several months later, Grace visited John in Australia, and less than a year after that, John moved to the US and the couple eloped.
“I was very emotional because we waited a lifetime, really, to say those words,” says Grace of their wedding day.
They fell in love in the 1980s but married other people. 23 years later they reconnected
The couple eloped, and 10 years later celebrated their wedding anniversary in Hawaii, pictured.
Falling in love again, 23 years later, was as bittersweet and complicated, as much as it was “euphoric.”
Some loved ones were hurt by their reunion. Some friends thought they were both going through midlife crises. For John, moving across the world from his children was particularly tough.
“It was extremely hard, extremely emotional,” he says.
“It was a couple of years of really difficult times with that move,” says Grace.
But as the dust settled, John and Grace were able to spend significant time in Australia, as well as in the US.
They became a cross-continental blended family, bringing their children together whenever they could. Some of John’s children have since studied and worked in the US.
“What’s amazing is all the five kids get on pretty well together,” says John. “We can take them on a vacation and everyone gets on well, we have a good time.”
“We like to think that in the end, when you get past the pain, we made all of our kids’ lives so much bigger, and set a great example for love,” says Grace.
Making up for lost time
They fell in love in the 1980s but married other people. 23 years later they reconnected
Grace and John say they are trying to make the most of every day together, and travel a lot — including to the Taj Mahal in India, pictured here.
Today, 15 years since their reunion, John and Grace still live together in the US, where they’re “making up for lost time.”
“It almost feels like we’d never been apart,” says John.
They try to enjoy, as Grace puts it, “a lot of traveling and adventures and experiences to create a lifetime of memories in a shorter, compressed period of time.”
Loved ones who were originally naysayers have come round in the interim. And as for Grace and John, they’ve both come to believe things happened the way they should have.
“It’s worked out the way it was meant to work out,” says John, who says the decision to be together wasn’t easy, but it’s always been worth it.
“If we tried to carry on from 1984, we probably wouldn’t have been mature enough to get through that period to get to where we are now,” says Grace. “So I feel sad, but I know that I have the best of it now. So it can’t really be sad, because it all worked out the way it was supposed to — despite all of our mistakes that we made, including me not getting on the plane.”
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What I’m about to say may shock you. Some men only want you for sex.
WHAT?!
I know. Crazy, right?
They look at you like a juicy steak that needs to be flipped, tenderized, and flambéed. They don’t care how sweet or smart you are, or how much value you bring to the table. They want to brand you like a cow with their initials square on your ass.
OWNED
Here are some signs he only wants to bone.
He flat out said so
Fortunately, most of the time these guys will tell you flat out they’re only looking for a good time.
Or they dress it up in other variations like, “We can keep it on the down low” or “We’re just hanging out.”
Either way, take this at face value and run the other way. Don’t fool yourself into hoping for something better.
It isn’t going to happen.
He has a wife or girlfriend
This is a no-brainer, yet many women rationalize taking sloppy seconds will somehow lay the first brick on the path to true-love-forever.
They think they’re powerful and compelling enough to persuade a man to leave his situation. They couldn’t be more wrong.
Do yourself a favor and don’t be a side chick. Have more respect for yourself than that.
He doesn’t want to be seen with you in public
He doesn’t introduce you to his friends, his co-workers or his dog, and he insists it stay that way.
In fact, the only time he wants to see you is at night, with the shades drawn, underneath the black light in his bedroom.
And please, absolutely no pictures, social media adds or tags. He doesn’t want to associate anything with you but a secret 2-hour midnight fantasy.
So please be nocturnal and remain unseen.
He tries to get you drunk
You’ve mentioned your favorite restaurant and maybe even what your favorite flowers are, and he’s either laughed his ass off or ignored you altogether.
But if you’re willing to drink, he’s picking up the tab!
He’ll gleefully scoop you into his car, playing the designated driver hero dude on his way to your place.
He doesn’t care that you have a husband or boyfriend
A lot of guys don’t care if you’re married or involved. In fact, it makes them want you even more.
Why? Because he doesn’t have to invest in anything other than sex because the assumption is you have no emotional investment in him.
That’s fertile ground for no strings attached sex. At least that’s what he thinks. Don’t give him the satisfaction. In fact, don’t give him anything.
He doesn’t talk to you about anything other than sex
If every conversation you’ve had with him revolves around, hints at, or leads to landing in the sack, that’s all he wants.
Shocker. (Including the Shocker.)
He doesn’t want to get to know you or what makes you tick. He wants to know what your hooha looks like and he’s desperately trying to convince you to show it to him.
He offers to pay for it
Yikes!
He knows he doesn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell so he pulls out his fat wad and flashes it in your face.
Then he asks what you’d be willing to do for every bill he methodically draws from the stack and lays on the table.
If you’re into getting paid for sex, Go Team. Keep on keepin’ on. But if you’re not, tell him to get the hell out and let the door hit him in the ass.
He doesn’t respect you when you say no
He keeps pressing you, even after you’ve told him to throw himself off the nearest cliff. To him, hearing you tell him no is like hearing you say maybe, or sometime soon.
No doesn’t mean “Convince me.”
He just doesn’t get it, so enlist the help of your brother or other beefy, intimidating bro-dude friends to kick his ass. If he’s smart, he’ll take the hint.
Call the authorities if you’re genuinely in trouble.
Don’t get caught up in the douchebag’s game of sexual conquest. It’s a no-win situation. And don’t look at him like a soul who needs saving because that’s exactly how he’s drawing you in.
If you’re looking for a relationship and not just a good time, let these dudes roll on by and keep your sanity in tact. After all, you’re worth it, aren’t you?
I admired my future husband from afar for a couple of years before we finally met at a horse show where we were both competitors. He had a great sense of humour, was a terrific horseman, and looked like Frank Sinatra. I was hooked.
He was recently divorced and looking. Of course, I had been looking at him for a long time already. I was 20 and he was 45. I saw nothing but his smile. Neither the age difference nor the fact that he was two inches shorter than I am made any difference.
There was something about him that caught and held my attention. Perhaps it was the way he treated his horses…he talked baby talk to them and I loved it.
Our first date followed that show.
We put our horses away in their respective barns then he picked me up for dinner in his Rolls Royce. He was wealthy, but it made no difference to me. He could have been a starving, out-of-work cowboy; I didn’t care. It was love at first sight.
Within a year, I was marrying an older man.
We were married and continued our winning ways together.
One of our horse trainer friends invited us to dinner one evening. The wife was older than I was but she, too, was many years younger than her husband. After eating, the men talked about horses and training while we girls sat in the kitchen over a cup of tea and talked about being married to men twice our age.
She mentioned that although she loved her husband dearly, he was slowing down and she was still rearing to go. She warned me about what was to come. Aches, pains, and illnesses…she didn’t paint a pretty picture.
Some years later my husband had a stroke. He was 58. Within the year, I found myself alone, running a ranch without my best friend and confidant. I was only 34.
Things that had been so routine suddenly seemed strange and out of place. I began to doubt my abilities in the show ring. I was no different, but my life certainly was. The vultures came out of nowhere, and I had no one to watch my back.
I had to keep telling myself that although my partner was gone, I was still the same person, I held the same knowledge, and my talents were still as great as ever. Yet a part of me was missing. It was hard to function as a whole person.
I had known for a year that his life was ebbing and he would be leaving me. I often thought of what would be worse: a knock at the door informing me that my husband had been killed in a car wreck or watching him slowly slip away, hour by hour, day after day.
I was with him when he took his last breath. I felt as though it was mine. One second he was there and the next he was gone. We had said all there was to say between two people in love. Sharing the good times and the sad times, we relived our entire married life within a few days. Then he was gone.
I missed hearing him in the barn, talking to the horses. I expected him to walk around the corner any second to ask me a question or ask for my help. Instead, there was only silence. Day after lonely day … silence.
I no longer had the desire to go to the shows, let alone win. I questioned what would happen to me. I wanted to shrivel up and die with him. My life as I had known it was over.
My saving grace was running into the woman that had long ago warned me about what I was in for by marrying a much older man. She too had lost her husband.
She had continued running their ranch after her husband’s death. I figured that if she could make it, so could I. I asked her to tell me the steps to dealing with the pain and the emptiness. She shared her grieving process with me, advising me to continue my life as it had been before he died. It helped, but still, the pain and numbness remained.
Slowly, I dug into my horse business again, realizing that my late husband wouldn’t be happy if I quit and walked away from what we had built. I started showing again…and winning. With each blue ribbon, I’d raise it in the ring as though showing it to my love. I could feel his approval and could picture that ice-melting smile.
Over time I realized that he wasn’t “gone,” he was just in a different form. I can still feel his presence at times. Love never dies — not even death can end it.
Before he died, he told me to remarry and live happily; I was too young to be single and alone. It took a couple of years to get to know myself again before finding my current husband. He, too, is perfect for me. We’re a match made in Heaven if you know what I mean.
There are people in the world who are incapable of love. Sadly, it happens more often than anyone would like to admit.
People who are incapable of love don’t love themselves. Without that, they can’t possibly love another person or even know how to experience love if they haven’t learned to love who they are first. Therefore, maintaining a loving relationship is nearly impossible for them.
Can a person be incapable of love?
The answer is yes, they can. The reasons some people are incapable of love could stem from their negative childhood experiences, past relationship traumas, or even their personality traits.
However, people can work on themselves and get out of that situation given enough determination and want of it.
Here are some tell-tale signs someone is incapable of love.
1. They blame others.
People who are not capable of love have a tendency to blame problems on other people. They lack insight into how they may be contributing to the problem.
They are narrow-minded and only focused on how a situation or relationship benefits them or holds them back. They rarely put fault in themselves for things not working out as they planned.
2. They have no accountability or responsibility for their mistakes or wrongdoing.
People who lack the ability to fully love someone have a limited ability to see their fault in situations or relationships. Instead of working on things in the relationship as a two-way street, it’s often one-sided.
If someone can’t even love themselves, how are they supposed to see fault in their limited and narrow mind? They can’t. And they won’t even try.
3. They make excuses.
For both current or future relationships.
Again, having to own up to something would take some sort of self-awareness and knowledge about yourself. Instead, people who can’t love will make excuses for their behavior: “Oh I was drunk, don’t take it personally,” “I don’t usually act like that,” and, my personal favorite, “You just made me so mad.”
You became so mad you didn’t recognize yourself? Please justify your behavior some more.
Justification and making excuses are common in those who lack a sense of self and have no capability of loving another person.
4. They give up easily.
They simply give up if something or someone doesn’t benefit them anymore. They don’t think about the other person. To be quite frank, they don’t really care.
When something no longer serves a purpose that favors the loveless person, their interest in a person and the relationship diminishes.
5. They show less interest in growing as a person.
As a result of the above statements, this person will not show much interest. As time goes on, you’ll notice their attention span shortening almost as if they are saying they don’t care without speaking the words out loud.
6. There is a lack of communication.
As a result of someone being unable to love and their general close-minded nature, they communicate infrequently.
They will allow upset or hurt feelings to stir up inside of them until they can’t handle it anymore and they explode. This frustration is within them so they really shouldn’t be blaming someone else.
7. They emotionally withdraw.
They will emotionally withdraw from the relationship while you may or may not be aware of what is happening in their mind due to their emotional difficulties. You may be working on the relationship while they move further and further away from you.
8. They are unhappy.
People unable to love are also unhappy. They may explain this is a new thing or that it’s been progressive.
But here’s the truth: The unhappiness started with the person and not having a clear foundation of who they are. They become unhappy because they don’t know who they are.
9. They are self-absorbed.
Me, me, me. It’s always about them. It’s always what they want first. No compromise. They don’t care to find out who they are but they will take, take, take. It is always about them.
10. They are close-minded.
These folks are often very rigid and stuck in their ways. If you can’t open yourself up for love, then you’re nowhere near ready for a relationship.
If they don’t love themselves or have a certain level of respect for themselves, they are not going to have a successful relationship and you should run… like, yesterday.
11. They care too much about other people’s opinions.
They rely too heavily on making people like them that they won’t have any time to care for your needs or wants. Rather you may end up being the “support system” for them.
You will be the one they look to you to boost their ego when someone doesn’t like them.
12. They could have emotional deprivation disorder.
Emotional Deprivation Disorder is “a syndrome (a grouping of symptoms) which results from a lack of authentic affirmation and emotional strengthening by another.”
That is, people with EDD were deprived of feeling his or her own uniqueness or goodness while growing up causing them to stunt their emotional development. They can’t possibly maintain a healthy relationship because they don’t have the necessary “education” or “knowledge” to do so.
It’s like if you tried performing brain surgery without going to school for it. You don’t know what to do, where to start, or how to react, right? That is what it is like for these people with this disorder.
They were never allowed to understand their feelings, so they have no idea what to do about it, and they are incapable of feeling love because they’ve never experienced it (or don’t realize that they have). Therefore they have an inability to form mature relationships.
What does lack of love do to a person?
A person who is lacks love could end up having a horrible life. Not having love in your life by giving it or receiving it can lead to a deeply unhappy person.
These people can end up feeling more lonely since falling in love isn’t really an option for them. Not only that, but they are more likely to experience depression and stress; and, in general, can be in worse health than those who live with love in their lives.
People who live without love in their lives end up with intimacy issues making for failed relationships. Most of the time they fear love because they have never known it.
Falling in loveisn’t a choice; it’s an irrational chain of events that simply cannot be stopped. It can happen slowly, over time, or quickly in a matter of moments. One glance. One touch. One eight-hour phone conversation. And it’s all over.
Falling in love is the easy part — the excitement that comes with learning what makes another person tick, and the equally terrifying counterpart of exposing your soul to somebody else. It’s interesting, unique. It never happens the same way twice.
But staying in love is a choice. An active decision-making process that requires work and dedication.
It’s easy to fall in love with somebody for all their good qualities: they’re smart, sexy, funny. These things are easy to love.
Staying in love is the hard part. The rush dissipates and there are just two flawed people trying to come up with new ways to fall in love.
You start running out of things to talk about, you catch yourself telling the same stories over and over again. And the blinders you once had to each other’s imperfections slowly disappear.
Maybe it’s little things — like he always seems to forget important days or isn’t as thoughtful as he used to be when he was trying to win your affection. Maybe it’s big things — like he screams stuff when he’s mad that he can’t take back.
At the end of the day, nobody’s perfect and everybody comes with their own unique set of flaws and features.
People who stay in love don’t do so because they have no choice; every single day is a choice.
Over the course of time, you begin to realize that the person you fell in love with is imperfect, and the true act of love, the true definition of loving someone, is loving those imperfections as wholly and completely as you love the good.
Love is saying I see you, all of you, exactly how you are — the good, the bad, the things that you don’t want anybody else to see. I see what you’re ashamed of, what you wish you could hide.
I see these things, and I still love you. I still choose you.
And you hope and pray and plead for the other person to do the same.
To take your set of shortcomings and love them in the same way.
To see you at your worst, as a mess on the floor, and they decide to lay down with you and help you through it.
To stick around when sh*t gets unimaginably hard and tough and complicated.
A 23-year-old English man who has never been on a date in his life is trying to find a girlfriend by advertising himself on a large highway-side billboard near his home city.
Ed Chapman claims to have spent his teenage years and his early 20s trying to find a girlfriend using more conventional means, like socializing and using dating apps, but with no success. So the 23-year-old man from Leeds, in the UK, decided that it was time for desperate measures. He put up some serious money to rent a large advertising banner next to the M621 motorway that goes into Leeds and crossed his fingers. He has already had more success with it than he did in his entire life, as he claims to have been overwhelmed by the number of messages from potential girlfriends.
“I reached an age where I thought I at least should have been on one date before. But I’ve been single for all of my 23 years and I’m ready to find someone to hopefully be in a relationship with,” Champman said.
“I had tried some dating apps, but it didn’t go well for me at all, so I decided I needed to try something different and thought having my own billboard would be a good way of meeting people,” the 23-year-old added.
Putting up a large banner with your face on it and the simple message “Date Me!” takes some courage, especially from someone who’s never been on a date before, but in Ed’s case, the risk seems to be paying off. Apparently, he received his first message from a woman interested in dating him on the first day that the billboard went up.
“I received my first message on the same day the billboard went live and since then, I’ve had a few messages from women between the ages of 18 to 48,” Ed told Caters News. “It’s quite a mix. It’s really exciting and a sign there’s something positive to come.”
Billboards have been used by others to find love. A fellow Englishman struggling with dating apps did it last year, a mysterious Mormon millionaire made headlines with the same tactic in 2019, and a single entrepreneur advertised himself in the same way back in 2013.
There are people in the world who are incapable of love. Sadly, it happens more often than anyone would like to admit.
People who are incapable of love don’t love themselves. Without that, they can’t possibly love another person or even know how to experience love if they haven’t learned to love who they are first. Therefore, maintaining a loving relationship is nearly impossible for them.
Can a person be incapable of love?
The answer is yes, they can. The reasons some people are incapable of love could stem from their negative childhood experiences, past relationship traumas, or even their personality traits.
However, people can work on themselves and get out of that situation given enough determination and want of it.
Here are some tell-tale signs someone is incapable of love.
1. They blame others.
People who are not capable of love have a tendency to blame problems on other people. They lack insight into how they may be contributing to the problem.
They are narrow-minded and only focused on how a situation or relationship benefits them or holds them back. They rarely put fault in themselves for things not working out as they planned.
2. They have no accountability or responsibility for their mistakes or wrongdoing.
People who lack the ability to fully love someone have a limited ability to see their fault in situations or relationships. Instead of working on things in the relationship as a two-way street, it’s often one-sided.
If someone can’t even love themselves, how are they supposed to see fault in their limited and narrow mind? They can’t. And they won’t even try.
3. They make excuses.
For both current or future relationships.
Again, having to own up to something would take some sort of self-awareness and knowledge about yourself. Instead, people who can’t love will make excuses for their behavior: “Oh I was drunk, don’t take it personally,” “I don’t usually act like that,” and, my personal favorite, “You just made me so mad.”
You became so mad you didn’t recognize yourself? Please justify your behavior some more.
Justification and making excuses are common in those who lack a sense of self and have no capability of loving another person.
4. They give up easily.
They simply give up if something or someone doesn’t benefit them anymore. They don’t think about the other person. To be quite frank, they don’t really care.
When something no longer serves a purpose that favors the loveless person, their interest in a person and the relationship diminishes.
5. They show less interest in growing as a person.
As a result of the above statements, this person will not show much interest. As time goes on, you’ll notice their attention span shortening almost as if they are saying they don’t care without speaking the words out loud.
6. There is a lack of communication.
As a result of someone being unable to love and their general close-minded nature, they communicate infrequently.
They will allow upset or hurt feelings to stir up inside of them until they can’t handle it anymore and they explode. This frustration is within them so they really shouldn’t be blaming someone else.
7. They emotionally withdraw.
They will emotionally withdraw from the relationship while you may or may not be aware of what is happening in their mind due to their emotional difficulties. You may be working on the relationship while they move further and further away from you.
8. They are unhappy.
People unable to love are also unhappy. They may explain this is a new thing or that it’s been progressive.
But here’s the truth: The unhappiness started with the person and not having a clear foundation of who they are. They become unhappy because they don’t know who they are.
9. They are self-absorbed.
Me, me, me. It’s always about them. It’s always what they want first. No compromise. They don’t care to find out who they are but they will take, take, take. It is always about them.
10. They are close-minded.
These folks are often very rigid and stuck in their ways. If you can’t open yourself up for love, then you’re nowhere near ready for a relationship.
If they don’t love themselves or have a certain level of respect for themselves, they are not going to have a successful relationship and you should run… like, yesterday.
11. They care too much about other people’s opinions.
They rely too heavily on making people like them that they won’t have any time to care for your needs or wants. Rather you may end up being the “support system” for them.
You will be the one they look to you to boost their ego when someone doesn’t like them.
12. They could have emotional deprivation disorder.
Emotional Deprivation Disorder is “a syndrome (a grouping of symptoms) which results from a lack of authentic affirmation and emotional strengthening by another.”
That is, people with EDD were deprived of feeling his or her own uniqueness or goodness while growing up causing them to stunt their emotional development. They can’t possibly maintain a healthy relationship because they don’t have the necessary “education” or “knowledge” to do so.
It’s like if you tried performing brain surgery without going to school for it. You don’t know what to do, where to start, or how to react, right? That is what it is like for these people with this disorder.
They were never allowed to understand their feelings, so they have no idea what to do about it, and they are incapable of feeling love because they’ve never experienced it (or don’t realize that they have). Therefore they have an inability to form mature relationships.
What does lack of love do to a person?
A person who is lacks love could end up having a horrible life. Not having love in your life by giving it or receiving it can lead to a deeply unhappy person.
These people can end up feeling more lonely since falling in love isn’t really an option for them. Not only that, but they are more likely to experience depression and stress; and, in general, can be in worse health than those who live with love in their lives.
People who live without love in their lives end up with intimacy issues making for failed relationships. Most of the time they fear love because they have never known it.
Jada Pinkett Smith briefly addressed the Oscars slap incident on Wednesday’s episode of “Red Table Talk.”
Pinkett Smith’s husband, Will Smith, took to the stage at the Academy Awards in March and slapped presenter Chris Rock after he made a joke about Pinkett Smith’s close-cropped haircut.
The actress suffers from alopecia, which causes hair loss.
On Her Facebook Watch show, Pinkett Smith had as a guest the mother of 12-year-old Rio Allred, who died by suicide after being bullied for having alopecia.
“This is a really important ‘Red Table Talk’ on alopecia. Considering what I’ve been through and what happened at the Oscars, thousands have reached out to me with their stories,” Pinkett Smith said during the show.
“I’m using this moment to give our alopecia family an opportunity to talk about what it’s like to have this condition and to inform people about what alopecia actually is.”
She then addressed the incident between her husband and Rock.
“Now, about Oscar night, my deepest hope is that these two intelligent, capable men have an opportunity to heal, talk this out, and reconcile. The state of the world today, we need ’em both, and we all actually need one another more than ever,” she said.
“Until then, Will and I are continuing to do what we have done for the last 28 years, and that keeps figuring out this thing called life together. Thank you for listening.”
It was Pinkett Smith’s first public remark about what happened at the Oscars. In April, a title card at the beginning of her show read, “Considering all that has happened in the last few weeks, the Smith family has been focused on deep healing. Some of the discoveries around our healing will be shared at the table when the time calls.
Until then the table will continue offering itself to powerful, inspiring, and healing testimonies like that of our incredibly impressive first guest.”
Her husband publicly apologized to Rock and the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences in a statement after the incident.
The Academy banned Smith from attending the Oscars for a decade as punishment.
Being in a relationship may be one of the best things in this life and can be so sweet when you and your partner understand each other and are both on good terms. At this point you get to enjoy every bit of what being in a relationship has to offer.
Now a days, most relationships seem to be turning into a give and take situation which has led to crash and break ups in many relationship.
Many would argue that now are days there is no relationship where true love from both partners exists. It’s either the guy is with the girl for what he can get from her or the girl is with the guy for what he has to offer her.
Trust me when I say this that true love still exist in some relationship which is the case of these two lovers, whose whatsapp conversations were leaked by an unknown person.
Below are screenshots of their leaked whatsapp conversation:
From the whatsapp conversation, you would see how this girl who is in love with this rich guy, felt really bad just because her boyfriend failed to turn up in her house as planned and you will also notice how bad the guy felt about it but kept apologizing with ever opportunity he had.
I believe true love still exists only when you find the right partner, but with the wrong partner you wouldn’t believe it does exist.
The question is do you think true love still exists?
How do you find love when you’re stuck at home? The coronavirus pandemic has made that challenging, to say the least. But millions of single Americans are finding ways.
Some have attempted socially distanced outings, others have turned to steamy video chats, while still others have tried international online dating as people adapt the art of seduction to the virus era, and dating apps are finding ways to adjust.
In normal times, Kate Earle, a 30-year-old teacher in Washington, finds it fairly easy to connect in person with men she finds attractive at first glance on Tinder.
“But because that’s not an option, the conversations are going on much longer,” she said.
Earle said those conversations also seem to veer more often toward “online sexual interaction” but she added that, she has never considered breaking lockdown rules for an in-person date.
“I think everybody is a little bit sexually frustrated, and I am as well,” she said.
“And there’s definitely been temptation to meet up with somebody … but I think it’s not so much that I would actually do it.”
Masks off
The Great Lockdown has driven single people around the world to online dating apps in record numbers.
Tinder saw an all-time high in usage on March 29, with more than three billion “swipes,” and the number of messages exchanged on rival app Bumble increased 26 percent over a two-week period in March in the United States.
The lockdown order came at the worst possible time for Beatrice, who was newly separated from her husband and living in the US capital.
A 30-something French woman, registered with several online dating apps in mid-March.
Since then, she has found herself bending some of the confinement rules to improvise outings with her new acquaintances.
“I was a bit nervous,” she told AFP. “It’s hard walking with a mask on your face when you’re meeting someone for the first time. So you end up taking off the mask after five minutes.”
After a few disappointing outings during which she observed physical separation rules, she met someone she liked — “and we ended up not respecting social distancing,” she admitted.
‘The cherry on top’
In the new normal created by the virus crisis, video dating is fast becoming the norm. While Tinder lacks this option, both Hinge and Bumble offer virtual dating.
Zach Schleien launched his Filter Off app for video speed-dating just before the pandemic struck, and at first only a few thousand users signed up. But that changed quickly.
“It’s like a 7,000 percent increase in less than a month,” said the 29-year-old New Yorker, who believes online dating is the best way to assess possible romantic interest before meeting in person. “It’s been nuts.”
So, can a romantic candlelight dinner with a stranger, on a laptop screen really work?
Dating coach Bela Gandhi cited the example of one client, a woman in her 60s, “who has fallen in love with somebody in the last six weeks, and they’ve only met via Skype.”
Gandhi, who founded the Smart Dating Academy website, says video can make it easy to develop “emotional intimacy.”
“And then it’s just the cherry on top of the sundae once you meet in person.”
But Alexandra Solomon, a clinical psychologist on the faculty of Northwestern University outside Chicago, doesn’t see it quite that way.
“Thank goodness we have video dating for now,” she said, but added: “When we come out of this, I really want people to go back to meeting across the table over a glass of wine or a cup of tea and having that old-fashioned organic experience of each other.”
Meanwhile, for those interested in exploring possible matches abroad, Tinder is keeping its Passport feature free until Monday.
After that, “matches will remain, so no one has to say goodbye to anyone new they’ve met,” said a Tinder spokesman.
Jenny, a 29-year-old woman in Seattle, nursed a latte on her date with a man she’d met on the dating app Bumble.
With coronavirus cases trending in the city, he’d invited her out that Saturday for what they both knew these days might be a risky rendezvous.
Jenny, who asked that CNN leave out her last name for privacy reasons, said the Anchorhead coffee shop in the city’s downtown area was much less crowded than usual.
She and her date shared interests in sci-fi and books, and their coffee date went well. They made plans to see each other again.
Statewide bans slowed down the romance
But then Washington state Gov. Jay Inslee issued rules effectively shutting down bars and restaurants in the city.
Jenny told CNN she has a high threshold for going over to a date’s house and they’re not at that stage yet. So for now, they’re texting and making plans to play Nintendo online together.
Two thousand miles away in Chicago, a corporate attorney had just met a man on Hinge, another dating app. For professional reasons, she asked that her name not be used in this story.
The conversation was flowing, ranging from their favorite podcasts to which presidential candidates’ campaigns they’d volunteered for. They were ready to meet face-to-face.
But they didn’t get that far.
Illinois Gov. J.B. Pritzker issued a similar ban closing all the places where they’d might be able to meet and kick off a fledgling courtship.
With 30 degree (Fahrenheit) temperatures in the Windy City, taking a walk or having picnic weren’t the most pleasant options either.
For now, they’ve settled on getting to know each other better over the phone calls.
Now that grabbing a drink with a potential lover feels almost like a seismic risk, millions of singles reckon with a dilemma as they seek love in the time of coronavirus.
Do you risk trying to meet someone or do you put love and intimacy on hold for weeks or even months?
As of March 12, New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio wasn’t ready to rule out the quest for love. He got a dating question at a press conference, and said, “It is dangerous to stop living life.”
He advised to do basic due diligence before meeting someone new.
“I do think it’s fine to have a social life but you got to exercise some smart rules, right?” De Blasio said. “If you’re sick, don’t go on a date. If the date is sick, don’t go on the dates.”
He urged prospective lovers to err toward over-communicating about any potential symptoms, asking questions such as, “‘Hi, are you sick today?’
“So the other thing is, you know, with a date, you know, you might keep a little more distance than you might have before,” de Blasio added.
Practical tips
For those who may be starting to catch feelings but don’t want to catch coronavirus, Dating.com is offering a few tips on how to spend some quality time with your special someone. The dating sevice’s tips include watching a movie simultaneously over video chat together, or cooking the same meal together over video chat.
Netflix offers a “watch together” feature, enabling viewers in two different locations to watch the same film or show together.
And the dating app Bumble published a blog post by epidemiologist Dr. Seema Yasmin urging those on the app to avoid shaking hands if users opt to meet in person and to stay several feet away from each other.
“If you’re confined to your home for days, you certainly have more time on your hands to plan a date with someone you met on a dating app,” Yasmin wrote. “But should you cancel? If you’re sick, absolutely.”
Hinge told CNN that it prioritizes its users’ safety and wants them “to feel prepared during this pandemic. We strongly encourage users to use their best judgment and be as safe as possible during this time, including following the latest guidelines from the World Health Organization.”
Dr. William Schaffner, an infectious disease expert at Vanderbilt University School of Medicine, had similar advice on how to keep dating, but stay illness-free. He recommends asking, “How are you feeling? Have you had any symptoms? Do you have any fever? Are you comfortable going out?
“I think that’s a reasonable thing to do,” he said.
Even with bans on group gatherings, Schaffner said that dating is still an option because it only involves two people. The trick is to enjoy each other’s company while slipping away from any crowds you see.
“Maybe going for a walk in the park and getting a cup of coffee afterward or a soda,” Schaffner said. “So dating styles may have to change, but I wouldn’t think two people getting together would be inappropriate. And you can have a conversation about that.”
The coronavirus pandemic has reached crisis levels in Italy, and offers a preview of how the American situation could develop in the coming weeks. The dating world is no different.
Francesa Owens, a mother living with her 19-year-old daughter Antonia in Spoleto, Italy, told CNN she suffers from chronic variable immunodeficiency, and she didn’t want her daughter possibly bringing Covid-19 home.
Owens told Antonia she could either live with her boyfriend or live with her.
Antonio had been seeing her boyfriend for six months, ate dinner with him every day and spent every weekend with him. But her love for her mother trumped all of it.
For awhile, they tried to keep up in-person visits at a distance.
“We used to just meet in the courtyard, but had to sit on separate benches,” Antonia said.
They couldn’t touch. Sometimes her boyfriend just sang to her from across the courtyard.
“I would see him every day. But I told him from now on we have to keep distance because my mom is chronically ill,” Antonia said.
Then the rules got stricter, and everyone had to stay home. “I’m not seeing him at all at the moment,” Antonia said.
The mother and daughter watch films and drink prosecco and tend flowers on their balcony to help pass the time. And Antonia still video chats with her boyfriend, who lives in the same village.
A long-distance relationship an hour away
Another Italian, 24-year-old Angelo di Gregorio, told CNN he met a man he liked in December and the relationship seems promising.
Di Gregorio lives in Valeggio, about 20 miles outside of Verona. His love interest lives about an hour away by car, so the pandemic’s travel restrictions have put their budding romance in purgatory.
Di Gregorio said that with his job leading travel expeditions, love can be fleeting, so finding someone is precious.
“It’s the first time that I feel like going forward, since I’m always traveling for work,” he said.
But the country’s travel ban has made seeing each other impossible.
“We FaceTime each other to talk. It seems like a long-distance relationship, even though it’s not.”
He says the two have placed their hopes on April 3rd, the date when the country’s travel restrictions are expected to be lifted.
“If this thing is being postponed, then we don’t know what we do,” he said.
Coronavirus has placed dating, like nearly every aspect of life, in a state of suspended animation.
“I don’t know how people can start dating right now, to be honest,” di Gregorio said. “They should just postpone it. It’s just too much.”
“Love Is Blind” finished airing on Netflix on February 27, and everyone’s favorite couple, Lauren Speed and Cameron Hamilton, ended up getting married.
The show ended production in the fall of 2018, so the two have actually been married for about a year and a half. They’ve been living in Atlanta in Hamilton’s house, “our house now” he tells CNN, taking care of their adopted dog and trying to start a family. They’ve had to hide their relationship on social media so the show’s ending wouldn’t be spoiled.
“Well, it would be hard to (fake it) for a year and a half. You’re talking about blending families,” Speed tells CNN about their relationship. “Like, my father was there and crying at my wedding. My mother, Cameron’s parents. (Everyone is) happy and involved in it all. I mean, we live together. We have a dog together.”
As for growing their family, Speed adds, “Yeah, we’ve been talking about it. I think our maternal instincts are kind of kicking in.”
So, despite the unusual way they fell in love — behind the walls of a “pod,” where “Love Is Blind” participants date without ever physically seeing the other person until after they get engaged — Hamilton and Speed say their relationship is the real deal.
Casting singles
“Love Is Blind” producers decided to base the show in Atlanta, and began looking for singles in the area before production on the show started, a representative for Netflix tells CNN.
Hamilton and Speed say a casting agent direct-messaged them on their separate Instagram accounts, asking whether they were single and whether they’d be interested in a dating show with a unique premise. They were not in each other’s social circles and had never met, but say their dating lives were dismal. They filled out an application for the show, along with the rest of the cast, took a comprehensive psychological exam, then did a number of Skype interviews with show producers.
“I think we were just open to the idea of finding love,” Hamilton says of agreeing to the show. “Of course the premise is a little crazy at first glance, but for me, I said ‘I want to keep an open mind about this. You never know.’ And here we are today. So I’m glad that I did.”
Speed says she initially thought the idea was “nuts” but after a string of bad dates, she agreed to try it out.
“Initially I was like, this is nuts, but I’m open,” she says. “You know, my dating life wasn’t going too well. It seemed like a great opportunity to possibly meet someone and date someone on something that’s deeper than just what they look like, which really appealed to me. I feel like dating nowadays is so surface, right? We don’t even know how to talk to each other.”
How they translated their relationship from pod to real life
Hamilton and Speed went from living for weeks on a soundstage built like two apartments (a men’s side and women’s side) to moving into the home Hamilton showed off on the show. They agree that taking away distractions such as phones, TV, music and the news while they were in the pods helped to secure their connection.
“It’s pretty apt to say that we were seeing each other’s souls,” Hamilton says. “The environment of the pods really helped us narrow in on each other and focus on what we were saying. … We kind of went into it prepared with questions we wanted to ask our future partner.”
Hamilton says the dates he had with Speed were just a fraction of how long the two actually hung out in the pods. He estimates their time together in the pods could actually have been more than 100 hours.
“It was very focused conversation,” Hamilton says. “I mean, none of it was forced at all, you know, we had that instant chemistry. With Lauren and I, we had many dates that just didn’t make the show for time’s sake. And, you know, we talked about everything that you could possibly talk about and we didn’t waste a minute in the pods.”
Seeing each other for the first time
“Prince charming,” Speed says.
“Awestruck,” Hamilton adds.
The marriage was legal
Yes, the two are legally married, and have been since they tied the knot on the show in 2018. They say it never got weird in the real world, and their only hurdle was “figuring out all the minutiae” of their day-to-day lives.
“Things like sharing physical space with each other,” Hamilton says, adding, “but at a certain point with anything, you have to take a leap of faith with relationships. Right? And that was the case here.”
Pet peeves
“Cam doesn’t rinse the dishes before we put something in the dishwasher and that drives me crazy,” Speed laughs.
Hamilton adds, “It drives me crazy how she loads the dishwasher, because there’s no rhyme or reason to it.”
But they’re happy, they say, doing their relationship backwards. “We got married and then it’s like we started dating after the marriage,” Hamilton says.
The two like to cook at home, go on hikes, play with their puppy, Sparks, and watch TV together.
Lauren’s dad
Speed’s father was tough on Hamilton on the series, doubting the whole dating experiment and questioning how Hamilton would handle an interracial relationship. Speed says he’s since come around from his initial skepticism to calling Hamilton his “son.”
“My dad comes over like every weekend — we have dinner with Cam, we cook and play music,” she says. “We have a good time. We wrestle fur baby, we laugh, we watch movies. Like, it’s great, you know, good family fun that we enjoy. My dad loves him.”
Getting recognized
Netflix has advertised “Love Is Blind” as the top-streamed series on the platform in the United States in late February. That means a bit of fame for Speed and Hamilton, who say they’ve had nothing but a positive reaction from viewers.
“People are coming up to us saying they love our story or we inspire them. It’s awesome,” Speed says. “I mean, it’s all been love, really. No negative comments or very little negative comments. We’re loving it. We love the fact that we’re making people happy cry.”
“I think we were just open to the idea of finding love,” Hamilton says of agreeing to the show. “Of course the premise is a little crazy at first glance, but for me, I said ‘I want to keep an open mind about this. You never know.’ And here we are today. So I’m glad that I did.”
Speed says she initially thought the idea was “nuts” but after a string of bad dates, she agreed to try it out.
“Initially I was like, this is nuts, but I’m open,” she says. “You know, my dating life wasn’t going too well. It seemed like a great opportunity to possibly meet someone and date someone on something that’s deeper than just what they look like, which really appealed to me. I feel like dating nowadays is so surface, right? We don’t even know how to talk to each other.”
How they translated their relationship from pod to real life
Hamilton and Speed went from living for weeks on a soundstage built like two apartments (a men’s side and women’s side) to moving into the home Hamilton showed off on the show. They agree that taking away distractions such as phones, TV, music and the news while they were in the pods helped to secure their connection.
“It’s pretty apt to say that we were seeing each other’s souls,” Hamilton says. “The environment of the pods really helped us narrow in on each other and focus on what we were saying. … We kind of went into it prepared with questions we wanted to ask our future partner.”
Hamilton says the dates he had with Speed were just a fraction of how long the two actually hung out in the pods. He estimates their time together in the pods could actually have been more than 100 hours.
“It was very focused conversation,” Hamilton says. “I mean, none of it was forced at all, you know, we had that instant chemistry. With Lauren and I, we had many dates that just didn’t make the show for time’s sake. And, you know, we talked about everything that you could possibly talk about and we didn’t waste a minute in the pods.”
Seeing each other for the first time
“Prince charming,” Speed says.
“Awestruck,” Hamilton adds.
The marriage was legal
Yes, the two are legally married, and have been since they tied the knot on the show in 2018. They say it never got weird in the real world, and their only hurdle was “figuring out all the minutiae” of their day-to-day lives.
“Things like sharing physical space with each other,” Hamilton says, adding, “but at a certain point with anything, you have to take a leap of faith with relationships. Right? And that was the case here.”
Pet peeves
“Cam doesn’t rinse the dishes before we put something in the dishwasher and that drives me crazy,” Speed laughs.
Hamilton adds, “It drives me crazy how she loads the dishwasher, because there’s no rhyme or reason to it.”
But they’re happy, they say, doing their relationship backwards. “We got married and then it’s like we started dating after the marriage,” Hamilton says.
The two like to cook at home, go on hikes, play with their puppy, Sparks, and watch TV together.
Lauren’s dad
Speed’s father was tough on Hamilton on the series, doubting the whole dating experiment and questioning how Hamilton would handle an interracial relationship. Speed says he’s since come around from his initial skepticism to calling Hamilton his “son.”
“My dad comes over like every weekend — we have dinner with Cam, we cook and play music,” she says. “We have a good time. We wrestle fur baby, we laugh, we watch movies. Like, it’s great, you know, good family fun that we enjoy. My dad loves him.”
Getting recognized
Netflix has advertised “Love Is Blind” as the top-streamed series on the platform in the United States in late February. That means a bit of fame for Speed and Hamilton, who say they’ve had nothing but a positive reaction from viewers.
“People are coming up to us saying they love our story or we inspire them. It’s awesome,” Speed says. “I mean, it’s all been love, really. No negative comments or very little negative comments. We’re loving it. We love the fact that we’re making people happy cry.”
Today, thanks to the internet, love can easily be found in any part of the world with no geographical restrictions.
Romance has been made easy in this 21st Century.
As a reminder, in the 16th century where there was the exchange of letters; people didn’t know so much about each other; one used to find out somebody “liked†him/her through a friend or a passed note. Now, these are scarce.
With the introduction of social media, people can scroll and choose who they want to get close to. Social media has made finding love very easy. It has also changed the way we experience love, intimacy, and connection.
Where did you meet your partner? Has social media in any way affected your love life? How often do you text instead of talk, Skype instead of meeting face-to-face, or use emoticons instead of actually articulating our feelings?
The answers to these questions, of course, are subjective. Get to know more in our latest interview with marriage and relationship counselor Ogochukwu Nweke.
In an interview with GhanaWeb’s Bernice Owusuwaa, they discuss ‘Love in Today’s Digital Age.’
Valentine’s day is one of the best opportunities to pop the question to your partner.
If you’re ready to take your relationship to the next level and you don’t know when to propose, valentine’s day is your best bet.
Since Valentine’s day is synonymous to love, you can propose to your partner as a way of celebrating the event. One thing you’re sure of is that your partner will love the surprise. Your valentine’s day will be memorable with this idea of the proposal.
This article will give you some proposal ideas that would relate to Valentine’s day and also leave your partner stunned. Below are some of the proposal ideas you can try.
1. Recreate your first date
The first date is obviously very special to you both and recreating it would be so cheesy. It would bring back memories and rekindle the love. The night will be complete the night after popping the question. Make it more interesting by ordering the same food you ordered and the same music that was playing.
2. A surprise getaway
On the calendar, this year’s valentine’s day falls on a Friday, which means you can have a weekend getaway with your lover. A surprise getaway will prepare your partner’s excitement for the news. This is a classic and memorable;e way of proposing to your partner as it would stay memorable.
3. Skywriting
This is one of the most unique ways of proposing to your partner. It’s not the regular proposal and not so expensive. All you need to do is contact a company that’s involved in skywriting and get your proposal in full gear. A beach would be the perfect location for this.
